


the opposite of love is indifference

by cresswell



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-05
Updated: 2014-09-05
Packaged: 2018-02-16 05:02:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2256783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cresswell/pseuds/cresswell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>it's better to feel pain than nothing at all. // the opposite of love's indifference.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the opposite of love is indifference

"Cora," Derek said, his voice breaking. "Don't go."

Her hands shook as she pulled shirt after shirt off their hangers, but she didn't look at him. "I have to. You wouldn't understand."

"Of course I understand!" Derek exclaimed, and Cora flinched, because he was right. "I left after Kate! And you know I wanted to leave after Jennifer, but I didn't!"

"You did," she said, her voice cold, and finally turned to face him. "You took me to South America. I was your excuse to leave."

Derek splayed his hands out in front of him, like he was trying to bribe her into staying. "This isn't like that, and you know it. Just because he's with her now doesn't mean he always will be."

"Just stop it," Cora said, her voice quiet, and began pulling jeans off their hangers. "No offense, but I don't want to talk about this with you."

There was a beat of silence. It was enough time for Cora to smell the anger rising in her brother, and she braced herself for his outburst. "Fine, don't talk to me. But leaving here is a mistake, and you know it." She heard him walk towards the door. "You can't run away every time you get hurt."

_Look who's talking,_ she wanted to say, but the tears in her eyes were welling enough that when she blinked, she felt one slide down her cheek. He slammed her bedroom door shut behind him and she sat down on her bed, curling her knees up to her chest and pressing her face into her hands. The room hardly looked like hers anymore. It just looked like a guest bedroom. She hadn't had a ton of decorations up anyway, but now that she'd taken the few pictures off the walls, it looked sad and abandoned.

"Like me," she said out loud, immediately hating how weak and pathetic it sounded, and pressed her face into her knees.

She wasn't raised to be weak. She wasn't raised to cry every time a boy picked her cousin over her- although, to be fair, that hadn't happened before now. But her mother had trained her to be cold and beautiful, and Cora had always found it easy to live up to the expectation.

Until Stiles.

Her ears caught the sound of gravel crunching under rubber and she rubbed her eye, standing up on wobbly feet to peer out the blinds. The glint of the moonlight off the Jeep's blue paint was unmistakable. 

"I am literally going to kill you," she seethed, knowing Derek would be able to hear her wherever he was. "Slowly, and painfully, and with a lot of joy."

She heard the doorbell ring and hurriedly crouched down beside her bed, shoving the small stack of photographs out of sight. On the top was one of her and Stiles at school, smiling with squinty eyes on the lacrosse field. It was after a practice game and the sunlight was bright on their faces, Stiles's helmet nestled in the arm that wasn't around her waist. His hair was sweaty and her cheeks were faintly pink and she hated the way it made her eyes fill up with tears again.

Her door swung open and she tried not to jump out of her skin, pushing the rest of the stack away and wiping her eyes on her sleeve. She knew it didn't do much good, though, when she turned and saw the look on Stiles's face.

His face was flushed, probably from the cold and rushing to get to the loft, and he was her complete opposite in that everything he felt or thought was so obvious on his face. "Derek called," he said unnecessarily. "Don't go. Please, Cora. Please don't go."

She held up a finger in warning, feeling her face screw up again. "No. You don't get to do that."

"Do what?"

"You know what." She bunched her sleeve in her fist and dragged it across her cheekbone, catching a tear. The motion made Stiles's hands twitch, like he wanted to wipe it away for her. "You know. You don't get to do this."

"Cora." His voice sounded so broken and she squeezed her eyes shut. "I don't understand. You're my best friend, besides Scott. I can't lose you."

His intentions were kind, but his words hit her like a punch and she began to cry again, too tired to try and stop it. She hid her face in her hands and felt him wrap his arms around her, pulling her against his chest. He smelled the same as he always did: like laundry detergent and Malia.

"I can't be your friend anymore," she said against his shoulder, half-hoping he couldn't hear her.

But he did. His arms stiffened around her. "Why not?"

She knotted her fits in his flannel, trying to hold him close, because she knew she wouldn't get the chance to again. Not after this. "Because I love you."

Stiles didn't say anything, but she could feel his heartbeat skip against her palm. She pressed on, worried by his silence. "I don't know how you don't know, because everyone else does. Derek does. Lydia does. Even Scott does." She felt his hand move to her hair, winding in the strands gently. "I love you, and that's why I have to go."

"What?" When she pulled back, he had a mixture of hurt and confusion on his face, and she turned to her suitcase so she wouldn't have to see him. "Cora, no. You don't have to go."

"You don't understand. I'm not- I'm not strong like you guys." She tugged the strings on her hoodie, anxiety worming its way through her veins. "I mean, I'm strong. But not the way you guys are. And it hurts me to be here, so I'm going to go."

"No," Stiles said, his hand catching her elbow. She almost flinched at the contact, but it was Stiles, and he wasn't capable of hurting anybody. "If it's hurting you, I'll break up with Malia. I'll-"

"No!" She said in surprise, turning around to face him with wide eyes. "You're happy with her. I can't ask you to give that up."

He looked so wrecked that it broke her heart all over again. "I won't be happy knowing that my best friend is hurting."

She rolled her eyes, trying to go for nonchalance. "I'll get over it."

He wasn't buying it. He tucked her hair behind her ear and she took a sharp breath, loud enough that he could hear it. He moved to cup her face, searching her eyes with his. "I love you, Cora. Just-"

"Just not in the same way," she finished, her eyes dropping to the floor.

Stiles shook his head in frustration, running his fingers through his already messy hair. "I just... I need you to stay, Cora. I can't imagine you not being in my life."

"Well," she said, her voice quiet, "I can't imagine being happy in your life."

It was a selfish thing to say, and she knew it. But it was also true, and part of being beautiful and cold was brutal honesty.

She bent down and dug out the stack of photos, thrusting them at his chest without looking at them. "Here. These are yours. I don't want them anymore."

He looked confused for a moment, shifting through the pile with furrowed eyebrows. But Cora watched as all his features softened, the scent of his guilt and shame evident to her. "Cora-"

"Don't," she said, holding up a hand. "I've said everything I needed to say." She grabbed her suitcase, heaving it off the bed, and started towards the door.

He stepped in front of her, his eyes wide. "I haven't."

She took a shaky breath, trying to steady herself, and looked him in the eye. "Then maybe you're not being honest with yourself." Her gaze trailed to his lips, and she could hear his heart stutter. "Maybe you love me in more ways than one."

She didn't stand still long enough to read his expression, instead skirting around him to the door. Her suitcase click-clacked all the way down the loft's stairs.

He didn't come after her.


End file.
